Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
