So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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