You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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