you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
