I'm jealous of your bromance
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
