College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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