Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
