i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize