He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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