the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
