I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize