Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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