Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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