brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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