You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Randomize