Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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