My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
