How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
