I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
