just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize