ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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