we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Randomize
