What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
