how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize