Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
