I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
