Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
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