He is an equal opportunity slut.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
