I don't usually arrange sex via text message
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
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