Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Randomize
