I love black thongs
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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