He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
