I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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