So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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