OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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