I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
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