I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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