There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
i think i just lost a toe
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
