so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize