She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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