Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
