..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
