my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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