The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
