well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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