guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
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