so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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