WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
