I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
We're not piercing ourselves today.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
