that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
