if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
